Wednesday, November 19, 2014

NaNoWriMo #4

  *
If there was truly evil in the world, it takes the shape of grocery stores, Greer thought angrily as she rolled the cart through the throngs of people loitering in the cereal aisle.
She managed to push her way through, finally getting out of the mass with a box of Lucky Charms in hand and temper slightly decreased. She huffed again, looking back over her shoulder as a small kid wailed at being denied some sugar-filled box.
      She was turning back around, ready to continue her shopping when she felt her body slam against someone elses. A hand curled around her waist, steadying her as they tumbled together.
     “Oops,” the smooth voice currently wrapped up around her said, apologetic tone seeping into the one syllable.
      She chuckled a little bit, as she felt the warmth of the strangers body up against hers, closer than she had originally thought.
     Too close, she realized suddenly, practically yanking their bodies apart. There. Some distance is better, at least from here I can’t scald him.
     The stranger coughed slightly, uncomfortable, and she looked up at that, seeing the amusement and the confusion clear on his face.
     His almost familiar face.
     His almost familiar very attractive face.
    Big green eyes and full cherry lips stood out against pale skin, nose red with the cold air; dark hair curled down and framed his face, reaching towards his shoulders; he stood tall, limbs long and lanky, legs fit into skin tight jeans and a loose sweater hanging off his shoulder slightly. Tattoos peaked out from his chest, and Greer averted her eyes back to his face.
     “Hi, uh sorry bout that, was is a rush and wasn’t paying any attention,” Greer rushed out quickly, not wanting to seem rude or insane (even though she was, some days).
     “No no, it’s not a problem, I don’t really have any bodily control, that was probably my fault,” the stranger said, a strange smile creeping onto his face. He still looked eerily familiar, the long curly hair and green eyes pulling themselves out of the back of her mind.
     She really couldn’t place where she knew him from though.
    “I’m sorry, this is going to sound really strange, but do I know you?”
    At that, the boy let out a loud laugh, slapping his hand over his mouth as soon as it spilled out. He nodded a bit, before smiling, “Yeah Greer right? We met once, I delivered you flowers? You had like mountains of them on your counter, yeah?”
     Greer’s mind suddenly clicked at the memory, going back over that night she had gotten spectacularly wasted and had tried to sleep it off but only managed to sob into her pillows. The doorbell had rang so many times, she recalls, it had killed her head. So many people brought in flowers. This boy had been one of them.
     She nodded, feeling a blush rise high on her cheeks, “Sorry yeah, forgot about that..”
    “Henley,” the boy, Henley, offered.
    “Henley,” Greer repeated, pulling her best smirk, “sorry for running into you, and for whatever I might’ve said the other night.”
Henley opened his mouth like he was about to comment on her last statement, and it took no time for her to decide she probably didn't want to hear it, so quickly turning on her heel, Greer darted from the aisle.
She finished her shopping relatively quickly, the majority of the food being bought being for Finn anyways, even though he has his own flat with his own food, because he always seems to complain when Greer doesn’t have anything for him to snack on.
        He’s probably just worried she’s not eating again. He can fuck off honestly.
       After checking out, she took her bags in hand, and set out on her trek back to her flat, where she could curl up in bed and try her best to keep her mind blank.
        Stepping outside though, the smell of wet pavement flooded her senses and she groaned when she heard the steady pounding of rain on concrete.

*
   I'm halfway to my goal, which is insane. I've never stuck to a project for this long, but with all of my friends and everyone urging me on it's been going really well. My sister actually yells at me when its been too long since I had writen.
     I'm really excited about everything so far, and while it is a bit hard to get into the headspace to write from a male point of veiw, I'm slowly learning to slip into it easily. It helps though, that it switches points of veiw and if I get too stuck on something happening in Henley's perspective, I can just switch over to a different scene with Greer and go back to the first later.
    My realization that I don't have to get everything perfect the first time around came to me during this last round-table, where I got a lot of positive feedback from people. I had been so nervous about it not making sense or being awful because I hadn't really gone back and edited it, that it was such a relief to have people tell me they really enjoyed it.
    The moments of relief kind of sparked that realization that, oh right, I can write, and that's why I'm here, and over-editing things isn't always what needs to be done, sometimes it just needs to get written. So I'm very thankful for a lot of the comments.
     The excerpt from above is from pretty early on in my book, and it's the second meeting of my two main characters, and what really leads into them becoming friends then becoming more. When Greer gets stuck waiting out the rain, Henley walks out, groceries in one hand and umbrella in the other, and offers to walk her back to her flat under the safety of his umbrella. It all goes from there honestly.
     ---
Abbey Nichole
   

5 comments:

  1. This is a magical encounter--and set in a supermarket, no less. Are you just playing with the rest of us mere mortals?

    The biggest thing this is missing is another reader. I'm going to change this in class.

    11/12

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  2. I thought this was great, it was well written and I loved the comical comment on how grocery stores were the appearance of evil in the world.

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  3. Ohmygod, I understand exactly how you feel. At this point I have so much trouble sitting down and writing (one of the reasons why I'm stuck at 19k words). I wish I had someone like your sister pushing me along! (Well, I have a Sydney)

    I would re-read your dialogue and read it aloud. To me it sounds a bit unrealistic.But, it's my opinion. Don't take my opinion as negative, please :)

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    1. Yeah, I'm so awkward in person with talking that it always finds a way to make my dialogue awkward as well, I'm working on it at the moment haha.

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  4. Abbey, this is just fantastic! I always enjoy reading anything you've written. I would love to read this whole story one day; the concept is fascinating and from what I've seen you're telling it beautifully. Congratulations on getting halfway to your goal! :D --Em

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